Thursday, September 27, 2001

Being able to cope quickly is a good skill
Resilience developed from helping others after terrorist attacks
By Morgan Landry
Skiff Staff

The attacks on Sept. 11 reminded me of the old adage, “What does not kill you makes you stronger.”

I recovered quickly after the events so I found myself helping people regain the strength to move on with their lives. I passed out copies of my last column, listened to people vent about their fears and calmed their fears of the impending war.

It made me wonder why I was able to recover so quickly compared to other people I knew. The only difference I can think of is that I have had to develop resilience.

The Oxford English Dictionary defines resilience as the “act of rebounding or springing back.” It is not denial or suppression of what you feel. It is the ability to quickly cope with a negative situation and move on with the positive areas in life.

Resilience is a healthy skill to have. In my experience, not only do resilient people have improved mental health, since they tend to be much more optimistic, but they tend to have better physical health. Resilient people’s relationships also tend to be healthier, since they are much more upbeat and positive.

A few weeks ago, I said in a column if you wanted to change your world, you have to change yourself. Most people (including me) do not change unless they feel they must. Now is a better time than ever, because you have the Sept. 11 tragedy to motivate you.

Can difficult times motivate people toward better times? Of course they can. To paraphrase cancer survivor and two-time Tour de France winner Lance Armstrong, turn every obstacle into an opportunity.

The first step in self-improvement is self-awareness. Being aware of the motivations and thought processes will help you become a stronger, more compassionate, more rational person. Or as TCU likes to put it, it will help you become an educated individual who thinks and acts as an ethical leader and a responsible citizen in the global community.

The best thing you can do right at this moment is to become aware of your internal thought processes. What is holding you back can be your very own subconscious thoughts and assumptions. Have you ever tried to make an important decision when you are thinking negatively?

The decision is probably not going to be as good as a decision you make if you are calm and positive. As a result of the bad decision, you feel more negative, and the downward spiral continues. At worst, you are an emotional wreck you feel terrible, and your relationships are reeling from that thing you know you should not have done.

The resilient person knows when he or she is entering a downward spiral. They usually have a plan when the negative thoughts surface. The first step is to actually know what you are thinking. There are many ways to do this, but I like to ask myself questions when I start feeling negative. For example, when I changed my major from English to computer information science, I found myself unable to do my work every time I tried to complete an assignment.

“Why can’t I do my work?” I asked myself. “Because the work is hard.” “Why is the work hard?” “Because I don’t understand it.” “Why don’t I understand it?” “Because I’m too dumb to understand the work!”

Bingo! I realized a mental block prevented me from even trying to understand my assignments. I did not stop there. I rebounded from my situation. The next step was to replace my negative thought with something more positive: I am actually rather intelligent. Then, I had to review my values to decide how I would like to do in this situation. Finally, I had to follow through on my decision. I’ll share more details with you on each of these things in the coming weeks.

And what was the end result? I am doing very well in computer information science, and people are actually coming to me for advice on how to do their homework assignments. Remember that you can be your best friend or your worst enemy.

hoose carefully and consciously.

Morgan Landry is a junior computer information science
and business major from Fort Worth.
She can be contacted at (m.e.landry@student.tcu.edu).