Sniff has become unoriginal
COMMENTARY
Ryan Salzman

The Sniff’s unoriginal level has been raised to code orange. Or maybe the title should be “The Sniff, dangerously close to creative void” or just “Sniff writers addicted to (www.theonion.com).”

A sincere bravo goes to those masked crusaders raising an unheard voice on our apathetic campus. I would also like to extend a hearty boo to those same crusaders for using that voice to better virtually nothing on our apathetic campus.

The Sniff, a four-page joke newsletter, offers a variety of amusing satirical stories that could grace anybody’s bathroom floor. The large print and illustrations are perfect for a quick read. Also, the large amount of profanity makes up for any perceived lack of substance.

I do not know what the exact intentions of the writers are but I can only assume that they have yet to be satisfied. Their circulation is worse than Vice President Cheney’s. I assume they distribute about 750 copies when the publication is printed. This means that there are enough Sniffs for one out of 10 students at TCU. I think that also means that there is about one flyer around Moudy professing hilarity and profanity for every five Sniffs demonstrating mediocrity. Both of these ratios are fairly poor. Also, their staff must be very small as indicated by the general lack of quality and quantity. If there were more than three people working on The Sniff I would be very surprised.

I know, I know. I shouldn’t criticize unless I do something myself. It is for this reason I extend a sincere bravo. The Sniff is on the right track. The anonymity maintained by the writers is perfect and should be continued. The fact that it keeps coming out is also great. The predictability of the content of each issue is not great.

To write for The Sniff it seems that you need three things. First, you need a small amount of knowledge of journalism and computers. Second, you need a great respect for The Onion and other satirical publications. Last, you must know the recipe.

Recipe for Sniff article:

Ingredients: edgy, funny title; profanity; familiar names; typical plot found in periodical; graphics and pictures.

Directions: Mix profanity, names, graphics, pictures and plot. Make sure to add enough profanity to remove all taste. Bake for 30 minutes. Make sure to not bake too long our humor will become dry. Let cool and top with title.

If article comes out thin, fluff with large print.

You keep writing them and I’ll keep reading them. People want to listen. Just use your voice.

Ryan Salzman is a senior political science major from Temple. He can be reached at (r.w.salzman@tcu.edu).